The Everyday Social Acceptance of Sexual Abuse

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As the media goes, social issues are always cropping up on our TV and computer screens; social injustices usually marking a few of those stories. Lately, I've noticed a lot of these issues have been based around a topic that effects most, if not all, of us at some point or another and is deeply embedded into our culture as an acceptable norm - the sexual degradation of women. 

It caught my attention initially with the leak of celebrity nude photographs early this month and I was appalled at the reaction I witnessed from a lot of people online - the most predictable came in the form of "if you don't want people to see you naked, don't take photos of yourself naked." So, with this rationale in mind, I suppose we should all give up all of our possessions because we don't want to be robbed. Don't want to be killed? Well, it's your own problem for being alive in the first place. 

The most rare of these comments expressed a genuine concern for the fact that people are having their private photographs illegally stolen, shared and publicised despite the fact that they are human beings who have every right to their own sexual autonomy and the ability to share their bodies with whoever they choose. It is not our responsibility to take that right away from them, and if Playboy can recognise this - "Jennifer Lawrence does not exist to fulfill my masturbatory fantasies. Jennifer Lawrence is not a thing to be passed around like a joint at a party. Jennifer Lawrence is a human being. And she’s not my property, and she’s not your property, and we all need to back off." - then so can we. Jennifer Lawrence - and all other celebrities victim to this leak - was a victim to sexual abuse, laid down bare and held still for the world to point and laugh, stand and discuss, pick out flaws and scoff in disgust at her behavior whilst they congratulated or actively ignored the ones holding her down. We are reveling in this fact; men hiding in their bedroom with her against her will, people huddling in groups and sharing the image of her with anybody who, God forbid, hasn't seen it yet. This is an invasion of privacy on a whole other level - her body belongs to her, and she can position it and photograph it and share with it whoever and however she pleases, and for that she owes us nothing. 

In a general sense, the everyday social acceptance of sexual abuse is so embedded into our culture that sometimes it's hard to recognise. More than likely, we've all witnessed rape or female rights being turned into a joke, no matter how small we may regard that - how many times do we hear a joke made out of dropping the soap? Frankly, I'm tired of hearing my friends come to meet me telling me about the man who decided to take it upon himself to touch her when she walked past, calling her a "slut" or a "bitch" if she doesn't wallow in gratitude for having the gift of his unwanted paw on her body. I'm tired of having to analyse the male gaze theory because it's still so visibly existent. One more thing I'm tired of: women being raped and downtrodden for not keeping her mouth shut about it.

Columbia university student Emma Sulkowicz is in the public eye at the moment for her visual arts project: she's carrying around the mattress that her alleged rapist raped her on in her dorm room. She has said that she will be continuing this thesis until he leaves the university, either by will or university action. This project blends activism with personal expression and through exposure, has quickly become a political statement. With politics, comes criticism. The word "alleged" screams out at you. "Alleged rapist" is focused on a lot. Two other students claim to have been raped by the same student but all accounts have been denied and he continues to attend Columbia. Let's re-visit the definition of the word "alleged": "unproven". A lot of people have decided to take this as a reason to decide that Sulkowicz is a "liar" - the fact of it is, alleged rapes occur. Not every alleged rape is a lie. The statistics for rape are way out of proportion to what they should be if all rapes were reported, if all rapes were easy to prove, if people weren't put off by the invasive procedures, if they weren't manipulated by their rapist (around 90% of victims are raped by somebody they know) - and central to this issue, if women weren't demonized for speaking out about their rape.

• "I was raped in my dorm room. No you weren't, bitch.  Everyone should take a good and long look at this video. This creature, annoying as she is, does not seem exactly like a monster. But she has the power to ruin your life forever by deciding that you "raped" her... This stupid whore in all her infinite emptiness and banality has been given the power to ruin your life."

• "I think she is using rape hysteria to stalk this guy."

• "I wouldn't even hate fuck this bitch. She disgusts me. She deserves to be punished."

• "Haha unbelievable. If I was the accused 'rapist', every time I saw her I would ask if she wanted to bang for the 'thesis' that I'm writing"

• "Attention-whore"

Emma's work speaks out to victims of rape; it is a symbolic and powerful piece that represents the emotional and psychological impact caused by carrying around the weight of experiencing rape. It draws attention to the issue, and for this she has received comments that have not only been derogatory towards her, but towards women in general, and the issue of rape itself. If you ask me, it's about time we stop teaching women that they have something to be ashamed of just by existing. It's about time we stop teaching that a woman's form is something to be begged for and thrown aside when received. It's about time that we accept that it's okay to be a woman - you don't owe your body to anybody, and you certainly don't owe an explanation for being proud and knowing that it belongs to you, and only you.

Love From Storm x

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